tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3364669902775880430.post3251697676644906437..comments2023-05-22T05:23:33.917-07:00Comments on Love in the Time of Chronic Illness: helping partners cope with illness: Early Love and IllnessBarbara Kivowitzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04069286366650175153noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3364669902775880430.post-1095835514490828102010-11-10T16:55:20.608-08:002010-11-10T16:55:20.608-08:00Hey Barbara,
Well, I guess it kind of seems like ...Hey Barbara,<br /><br />Well, I guess it kind of seems like the only option, to feel that way. I have been mostly able to give up missing the life I had before, but somehow accounting for the silver linings, like him, is more confusing. <br /><br />As for sustaining the joy, it takes blinders, at least for me. But also, with a partner like mine, there is more than I could have imagined to be quietly joyful about, just less to be exuberantly joyful about. Illness is an irritant, it brings things to the fore, but it also makes me thankful for who he is and not what we do together. I don't know if that makes sense, but I've been intrigued by thinking about it lately, myself.SBSnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3364669902775880430.post-69639150244362811672010-11-09T17:03:50.051-08:002010-11-09T17:03:50.051-08:00Hi SBS - so glad you and your partner have found a...Hi SBS - so glad you and your partner have found a way of dealing with symptoms & illness. I am intrigued by your thought about -- would the relationship have worked without the presence of the illness. And by your resolution that it is what it is.Barbara K.http://www.insicknessinhealth.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3364669902775880430.post-44272593489015664122010-11-08T18:34:25.930-08:002010-11-08T18:34:25.930-08:00I've been ill for almost 7 years, and my boyfr...I've been ill for almost 7 years, and my boyfriend and I got together 4.5 years ago. We've lived together for 2.5 years, so he knows the ins and outs of this more than anyone else, almost more than I do. <br /><br />Its a different ballgame, getting to know someone, starting a relationship, when you're already sick. And, in my case, sick without a diagnosis and only in your 20s. I'm amazed daily that he is willing to put up with all the unpleasant side effects of being with me, but I also sometimes wonder if we could have worked if I hadn't been sick. I guess it doesn't really matter, given that its the hand I've been dealt. <br /><br />Love the blog, Barbara.SBSnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3364669902775880430.post-73954894565369203822010-11-08T10:37:51.955-08:002010-11-08T10:37:51.955-08:00Hi Sue - glad you found my blog and thanks for sha...Hi Sue - glad you found my blog and thanks for sharing your story. And very glad that things are better for all 4 of you.Barbara K.http://www.insicknessinhealth.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3364669902775880430.post-17944617698629065032010-11-07T13:29:27.222-08:002010-11-07T13:29:27.222-08:00Hi -
I just discovered your blog through Infinit...Hi - <br /><br />I just discovered your blog through Infinite Daze. What a wonderful topic to blog about - I look forward to your book!<br /><br />I become suddenly ill almost 9 years ago with CFS, a debilitating immune system disorder. My husband and I had been married for 12 years at that point and had two young sons. Within a few years, both of my sons had CFS as well, so we've had our share of challenges.<br /><br />We had a few rough years at the beginning, especially when all three of us were very ill at the same time. The first year - before I knew what was wrong with me - was the worst. My husband and I were both very depressed at my sudden, mysterious illness, and his response was often to withdraw.<br /><br />I'm happy to say things are much better these days. Our kids are better able to function, thanks to medication, and I think our relationship is stronger than ever. We know feel - all four of us - that we are in this forever.<br /><br />I look forward to reading more of your blog.<br /><br />By the way, I posted a couple of my favorite books on this subject on a blog post last year:<br />http://livewithcfs.blogspot.com/2009/11/national-family-caregivers-month.html<br /><br />Nice to "meet" you!<br /><br />SueSue Jacksonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14532098225905355332noreply@blogger.com