TheValue of Depression & Anxiety

From an article by Dr. Xavier Amador in the Huffington Post. He argues that depression & anxiety have distinct benefits. They cause us to connect with each other.

What do you think?
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"Early in its development I was asked by the producers of the PBS Program "This Emotional Life" to consult with them about their examination of human emotions. One thing I recall saying to them at the outset was that our species evolved to feel a wide range of emotions-including some negative emotions--that served to connect us to one another. I remember one producer being surprised when I said this. She smartly asked "How can depression or anxiety help propagate our species?" ..........My comment was aimed at everyday episodes of depressed mood which, I argued, are normal and exist for a reason. They cause us to connect. When we are sad, people reach out to us and we feel the desire to be held, cared for, loved. Anxiety often has the same effect. And when we come together we can then pursue common causes such as the search for food, creating shelter, defense against predators -- our genes survive and are passed on to the next generation."

Illness Suicide Pact

Warning: this is a tough, sometimes forbidden topic to bring up - the topic of illness and suicide. Raising the topic of suicide is by no means an endorsement of it. And I don't believe that talking or reading about it pushes people to do it. I am a believer that what you don't acknowledge can be more harmful than what you do. In this spirit, I offer an article about a couple who entered into a suicide pact. Read it if you want to. Don't read it if it will disturb you. If you are having suicidal thoughts, please get help - see a therapist, a clergy-person, or call a suicide hotline like the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK

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Can you imagine a set of circumstances that would drive you and your partner to decide that double suicide is the only solution left?

I can. It's terrible for a couple to bear the debilitating illness of one partner. When both are sick and suffering, how is that to be borne? Illness, pain, and loneliness without resources or community can make "dusty death" seem like a better place than the "walking shadow" of life. I think some who suffer debilitating illness at some point, maybe only once, think about suicide as a relief.

Most don't take action. Some do. It's not for us to judge. Only to try to hold with compassion the realities of people's stories and wonder along with the writer in the story below -- what went through their minds at the end.
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from News.co.uk. February 11, 2009

Inquest told of couple's suicide pact

A pensioner was found dead in the back of his car following a pact with his wife that they would both end their lives, an inquest has heard.

Dennis Bramble, 85, of Garnett Avenue, suffered from a heart condition and his wife, Dorothy, was terminally ill with cancer. Mr Bramble did not want to be on his own should his wife die.

On the evening of October 6, 2008, the devoted couple had sat in the back seat of their car parked in the garage and taken morphine and temazepam to send them to sleep. It was then intended that Mr Bramble would turn the car engine on.

The following morning Mrs Bramble was found crouched down outside the garage by her daughter, and Mr Bramble was found dead in the car.

A post-mortem examination found he had died from a mixture of morphine and temazepam in his system. The car engine had not been turned on but the car headlights had been.

Mrs Bramble told police that she and her husband had gone into the garage at 6pm the night before. She said she had struggled to get out the car and when she finally did it was daylight and her husband was still breathing heavily, at which point she realized it was all 'going wrong'.

A diary documenting how bad things were for them both was found. Mr Bramble was becoming forgetful and Dorothy was often in agony with her illness.

It is still unclear what was going through his mind at the final moments.

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I'd like to know:

Have you ever reached the point of utmost despair and contemplated suicide? What kept you from taking action? What made you choose life?