Sunday, October 10, 2010

The Holidays, Already!

I don't know about you but I'm already feeling the holiday "dreads." Invitations, cholesterol masquerading as food, rivers of alcohol, late nights. I can feel my pain receptors begin to ignite just thinking about how to take care of myself over the next few months.

Other than the abandon and the gluttony, I also worry about letting others down if I have to bow out of an engagement I committed to because of pain. And I worry about letting myself down if I overdo things and risk doing what I know (but don't want to acknowledge) might cause a pain surge.

I do lean on Richard to be the voice of sound judgment. I ask him to provide the balance when I am strung out on the line between yearning to ignore risk and just indulge, and avoiding all social activity because I fear a relapse.

But I don't make it easy for him. When he is the voice of caution, I resist. I say, "It's the holidays, after all. Why can't I act like a normal person once a year?" When he is the voice of indulgence I shrink away and hide in a corner. "I can't possibly go out three nights this week. I'll crash."

So I hope maybe this holiday season I can find the balance between quarantine and hedonism.

What are your holiday challenges? How do you and your partner get through the holidays?


Baffled said...

This is going to be my first holiday since becoming ill so I'll take any tips from those of you with experience with this.

Anonymous said...

I can totally understand and relate to this post...don't know what a "normal" person is tho, might you mean someone who is healthier? enjoy your writing. thanks!

colleen said...

I enjoy your writing...Holidays need to be simplified when not feeling well. Don't ever sign on for too much. By "normal" do you mean someone who is healthier than you? I honestly think no one is normal around the holidays!!!!seems like everyone is scrambling, right? not worth it to stress out. stay unscheduled and be happy.

Barbara Kivowitz said...

Hi Baffled, anonymous, & Colleen and thanks for your comments.

Your question about what do I mean by a normal person really forced me to think - what do I mean??

I think I meant: someone who does not have to consider serious health repercussions of going to a party or eating too much stuffing.

But you really made me think (thank you!). I can have my condition and still be normal; and no one is really normal over the holidays. Two points really well taken.