Saturday, November 26, 2011

The sad-sweetness of holidays

My friend lost his wife eight months ago to leukemia. One month ago his grand-daughter was born. Her middle name is his wife's first name. This was his first Thanksgiving without his life partner in over 35 years. No one mentioned her name or spoke about Thanksgivings past - perhaps for fear of upsetting him. He did not speak of her either - perhaps for fear of darkening the day.

I think the not speaking made the day more lonely for all of them. Since they could not talk about the sadness of her absence, they couldn't reach the sweetness her presence brought to the table in years passed.

I don't know about you, but I think it's far better to speak and hold the sorrow than to sit alone together in silence.

1 comment:

Lynda Halliger-Otvos said...

So many I love have died in the last few years that any opportunity to talk or write about them is gladly taken and tears shed again for acutely felt losses.