Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Bad Times are Not So Bad

I have been under tons of work stress lately.  Not sleeping. Scripting conversations that will never take place.  Imagining justice where banality will inevitably prevail.  Not taking intended slights personally, but still suffering from the resulting alienation.  And moaning and bemoaning endlessly with Richard about the lost opportunities to make a difference.

Then I realized that I'm complaining, at full bore (pun intended), about a work situation.  Just like I used to do in the pre-illness, pre-pain days.  I was immersed in the actions and reactions of a scenario that had nothing to do with doctors or medication or waiting.  Everything that was happening was immediate.  I was a player, not a recipient.  I was suffering from the interpersonal, not the biological.

The biggest gift my illness has given me is the gift of perspective.  In contrast to the awfulness of the bad times and the pain-filled days, work stress is a walk in the park.

Has this ever happened to you -- where your or your partner's illness cast a different perspective on a work or other life situation?

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